In the mood to dance and write. Writing is the only one I can do

I’m randomly updating the music in my swing dance playlist. This one: https://music.apple.com/jp/playlist/swing-dance/pl.u-V9D7vdpHBbepg75?l=en

It’s 9pm on a Thursday it’s day night and I’ve been busy with work lately, not feeling particularly social. I mean, we’re in the middle of a pandemic so I guess that’s ok. Even though my lifestyle hasn’t changed really. I work with people as a teacher everyday. But also I’ve been wanting to (not just socially but emotionally) distance myself from people and do my own thing. I don’t know, I love being around people and meeting new people, but I’ve been too open and trusting and accidentally let a few hurt me, so I have been backing away a bit. And, I guess...I don’t want to go out of my way to be social, I want people to WANT to be with me enough that they try to make plans with me or invite me along, and if they don’t...well then, I can go wherever I want to on my own. I have the trains to take me on an adventure.

It’s making me really sad right now though. That I can’t dance right now when I had just been finally getting back into it here in Tokyo. Swing dance has been such an important thing in my life that’s made some of the best connections I’d ever made with people. 

I REALLY hate needles and have had reactions to past vaccines but like, just put it in me already so I can dance again.